I Don’t Understand

I have just had a discussion on Facebook with someone I don’t know – there was a post about the Supreme Court decision regarding abortion laws, wherein it was stated that each person has a right to make decisions about their lives, health, etc. The commentor said “just as she should have the right whether to wear a mask or not because this is the land of the free”.

My comment was yes, she does, if she does not care about affecting other people. She called it snide – and maybe it was a bit, although I wasn’t really thinking snidely when I said it. So I asked what the big deal was. Response: “it’s the land of the free”.

Does that then mean I don’t have to follow rules, obey laws, get a driver’s license, pay my taxes, wait for stores to open before I crash in? Because it’s the land of the free and I choose not to?

Sounds to me like some people either just do not like being told to do something – or some people are following Trump’s lead because he told them he knows everything – and they’ve swallowed that line.

Kinda like the person I know who posted “who agrees that it’s the media that causing racism division?” Because I guess it’s easier to blame the media than the guy you voted for and what has been inherent in our history for many years.

Boy, I just don’t understand people anymore.

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Share Your World – 6/30/2020

The last day of another month! They seem to be arriving more quickly lately, these last days of another month. Seems like a good time to share my world with Melanie and all of you.

Must we have evidence to know the truth? For everyday life, I don’t think I’ve required evidence to know the truth for most of my life, but lately – it seems I am constantly fact-checking things I read, so maybe now I do demand evidence to determine truth. We seem to have a variety of “truths” these days.

How much control does a person have over their life? We have control over the choices we make, but there are a lot of things that aren’t in our control that have an affect on our lives. We can decide whether today is the day we’ll go shopping – but we can’t control what happens when we leave our houses. We can’t control the other drivers, the weather, etc.

What is gravity and how does it work? Gravity is what keeps me from being Mary Poppins.

Can a person be happy if they have never experienced sadness?  How about vice versa? Yes, I think a person can be happy if they haven’t experienced sadness. Look at young children, for instance. However, as we grow, perhaps knowing sadness makes happiness all the better. The same would apply to switching the two for teens and adults, but little children do not need to know sadness to know happiness.

Please feel free to share a song, a poem, a quote or an image or photo to show what you were grateful for during this past week.    (Optional as always). I am grateful for neighbors who share their baked products as well as a lot of other things.

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Do I Have Something to Say?

Dunno.We’ll find out. It’s been awhile since I’ve written anything here. I’ve been busy you know – uh huh. My most important job is keeping the seats of my favorite chairs warm.

I did have cataract surgery the end of the week. OhMiGosh! What a difference it makes. Overnight the world became brighter and in focus – so much crisper. So I’m kind of on a type of restriction for awhile. This week the biggy is no lifting and no bending. I’m learning how many millions of times a day living requires bending. I thought I was prepared – things that are used frequently placed at counter height, that kind of thing. Then there are the surprises – like brushing teeth requires bending. What?! Won’t be able to mow the lawn for three weeks. Sadness here. Uh huh.

I found Cranberry Beans. Had no idea those things existed. I think they’re a lot like Pinto Beans. Yesterday I made Borracho Cranberry Beans – yes, drunk beans. They drank a bottle of beer. A bit spicy too, probably because of the jalapeños. They’re really very good over rice.

Our government. Sigh. Our government. Need I say more? Probably not, but I will. I saw Pence on the news defending Trump’s rallies in Tulsa and Phoenix. One of the weakest defenses I’ve ever heard. Freedom of speech, freedom to gather, all those freedoms that make it okay. Freedom to wear a mask if you choose. More of that “setting an example” thing we expect, or should expect, of the “leaders” of our country. The representatives of our country. Could we just vote tomorrow please?

I think I’ll just stay here in my home, by myself, with my masks handy in case I need to go somewhere. Living is kind of important to me.

I’m going to be a grandmother again! yep. My new grandchildren are due to hatch tomorrow. Hatch. Yes. Hatch. My daughter is getting chickens. Maybe I’ll even be able to go meet them this summer. The Covid thing, you know, slows down spending time with those you love as well as those you don’t even know.

My weaving is a happening thing. I’m on a kitchen towel mission these days. My two most recent projects:

Gifts for friends

There are baby swallows in one of the nesting boxes outside my window getting eager to fledge. Keeping their parents busy with providing the food necessary to give them strength to try that flying thing. A prime example of one of the reasons my cats can only go outside into their catio. Reduces the damage they can do to the local bird population.

Despite our “leaders”, my life really is enough. I hope yours is too.

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It is late – the time I am usually in bed, or at least going to bed. But tonight brought surprises, and I have these words roiling around that need to be expressed.

My daughter called me tonight. She had news about her father, my former husband, a man who had separated himself from us, from all that he had known. His parents had both passed, his brother died from alcoholism, he was living alone and, from what I can gather, his life was sad. My daughter had Googled his name and county of residence, and what she found was an obituary. From August of 2018. The obituary stated he died in the hospital on that date.”No family came forward.”

He died, from causes unknown, alone. Apparently he had no documentation that listed either myself or his children as family, as contacts.

We have had no contact for many many years. He had some contact with the kids for awhile, but it was sporadic and usually when he needed help, for a few years, but that diminished.

I am awake now, when I should be sleeping, thinking about passages. Thinking about living a life that leaves you completely alone. With no one to say goodbye, no one to miss your presence. I cannot imagine. I feel an infinite sadness.

I cannot imagine. Seventy-eight years of living, to die alone? What leads us to choose paths that lead to this? How do we get there? If I had known, I would have responded. But what could I have said? I know nothing of his last years – 50 years maybe? No, it can’t have been that long, but close to it.

If a tree falls in the forest, does anyone hear it? If a life passes without anyone to acknowledge it, did the life exist?

How do we pass in such an alone manner? How do we pass with nothing? A life without enough.

Questions without answers.

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As the Mind Wanders

The skies that were blue when I got up this morning have turned to gray. They are kind of meditative colored, I think. Gray is a rather soothing color, as long as it doesn’t hover over us for too many days in a row.

My mind is wandering this morning. It has no destination, it is not following a path, it’s just meandering aimlessly. Probably hiding from the news, because it’s growing so weary of the news.

I think WordPress is flexing its muscles, showing me who’s in charge. It allows me to “like” only some of the blogs I follow. It’s done this before and gotten over it, so I’m hoping it gets over it soon as I’m growing weary of it. I don’t always have words to say about a post, but I like to let people know I stopped by.

It would seem there’s more than one thing I’m growing weary of. Sigh. I sigh a lot these years.

I’m taking a bit of a holiday from life. Well, parts of it. Cutting back on news because. Mental health. We loosen restrictions, new cases of Covid increase. I’ll stay here, thank you. By myself.

I hope the current protests against racism actually cause some changes to be made. I feel like this is a rerun from years gone by, although this time feels a little different. More fervor, perhaps. More unity, perhaps.

I’ve been craving lemony something. Maybe I’ll make some lemon cookies today – I found a recipe online that looks good.

How did we ever get by without internet? I mean, you needed so many paper books of all kinds – encyclopedias, cookbooks, how-to books. Now it’s all here in my laptop, or my iPad, or my phone. Concise, precise, ask and I’ll show you the way, Google says. Google has found some good recipes for me, whatever its control issues might be. Ot whatever issues those that are here to protect (?) us might say it has.

Speaking of being protected – I’m not feeling terribly protected these years. I’m feeling kind of – neglected. Not by those important in my personal life, but by those who make the rules about my life. How about you?

I have a white dog, and a white cat, and an orange and white cat. They are all shedding. To top it off, the dog is a lab, the ruling breed when it comes to shedding, I think. So guess what you will always take home with you if you visit my house? I won’t charge you for it – some things in life truly are free.

White cat is feeling a need to check out, quite thoroughly I might add, the grocery bags that are waiting to be taken back to the car. White cat often feels a need to check many things out, quite thoroughly. She was born in Thailand, and she has a lot of those Siamese qualities. Including the voice, and the freedom to use it. She and dog work together when they think it’s time to get out of bed. I am never included in that decision making.

The skies are still gray. Hmm, it would seems I’ve now wandered full circle.

Wishing you a life with enough. Enough of the good stuff, that is.

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This morning is a wistful morning, perhaps enhanced by the gray skies. Then I saw a reference to Neil Diamond and Jonathan Seagull online, which prompted me to ask Alexa to play some Neil Diamond. It’s been pleasant – stirring up old wistful memories.

Back in the days when I could believe the world I lived in was fair, was just, was reasonable. Remember those days? Yeah, some of that was illusion, but in those days we had hope, we could see the sunshine. Our politicians seemed more interested in working for the good of the people and the country – or at least gave that impression. There was division, but not like today.

Then Neil sang “Coming to America” – oh my! People wanting to come to America and being allowed to do so. Nowadays – I think not so much. Added to the fact that this country has taken the attitude that immigrants are not wanted, the kind of country we have become no longer seems to offer the opportunity to better their lives.

We are a country of division and strife – partisan to the extreme, all encouraged by the man that somehow got elected to be our president. To some degree, I can understand the feelings of being ignored, the frustration, that led to people voting for him. To a small degree, I can understand. I do not understand the devotion to a specific political party or hatred of another political party that would allow otherwise intelligent, thoughtful people to ignore the fact that this man is no more than a swamp dweller, and he who comes from the swamp will not drain it. We became a nation of gullibility – and a nation with an electoral college system that is no longer viable, no longer working for the masses. Our political parties let us down, with the candidates offered – candidates with very high disapproval ratings. Yet, those parties handed these people their flags to carry.

So here I sit – wishing for fairness, for honesty, for integrity, for honor. For us to finally recognize that in every barrel there are bad apples, but overall, we are not bad people when we use our brains and open our eyes. It does not matter what color we are, nor what religion we practice, we are all human beings and should be treated as such, with the only factors necessary for us to be respected being our behavior and our character. Wishing  for the time when we could discuss our feelings and our beliefs without rancor – disagreements, yes, but not anger.

To my Facebook friends, I say NO I will not stop posting my feelings, preaching my beliefs. I get some of you are tired of hearing it – but I am tired of seeing the hatred in this country, and I feel a duty to stand up for what I believe. You can choose to read or not. You can choose to disagree or not. You can choose whether to read.

My fear is we are losing our ability in this country to have enough. To have our freedom.

Wishing for the time when this flag again stands for honor.

Image by DWilliams from Pixabay


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What If…?

These are questions we should all ask ourselves. Now. Not tomorrow. Now!

that little voice

What if I were black?

What if I were Margo Johnson, with the same personality, same intellect, same gifts, same abilities, but instead of being white I were black?

What if?

Would I have been treated differently than I have been treated as a white person?

Would I have been elected vice president of my high school class? Would I have been admitted to an all-girls school in southern Mississippi?

Would I have lived in the same neighborhood where the white Margo grew up?

Would I have had the same advantages I had as a white child?

If not, why not?

If I were black or brown, would I be angry?

Would I be protesting? Would I be sad? Would I be tired?

Would I be worried my child might be hurt, killed, stopped and questioned?

What if…?

I can tell you, I would be angry. In fact I would…

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A Powerful Reblog

This pretty much says it.

that little voice

I asked for answers to ‘where to from here’? Here are some.
Musings of a former hula hoop champion

The Price of Human Dignity

Posted on June 2, 2020


For many years, my uncle ran a butcher shop in one of the all-black neighborhoods of North Philadelphia. On August 28, 1964, a woman came into the shop and asked for the largest, best cut of steak my uncle had. He began to pull it out of the case to show her. She stopped him and asked that he simply put it at the front of the case and she would be back for it later. My uncle did as she requested. The woman did not return by closing time, when my uncle locked up the shop. He returned home and told my aunt, “I think something bad is going to happen in North Philly…

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Share Your World – June 1, 2020

Sharing again today, because I feel like putting words on paper – virtual paper. Because maybe it will be a bit of an escape from the US on fire right now. On fire because we talk a lot about change, but seem to do nothing other than talk.

it ever okay to commit a crime?  Please explain. That word “okay” is bothering me. No, it’s really not okay. But is it ever understandable? Yes. In times of hunger with no way to get food – if my kids were starving, or even if I was starving, I think I would resort to stealing for survival.

Do you deal with change well?  (not money, because I know some wit out there is thinking how bulky coins are. Well I did any how.  O_o  )  Some changes yes. In times such as these, what I am not dealing well with is our failure to change – every time something bad happens – the unwarranted death of yet another person, school shootings, riots – we talk a lot about changing, but we don’t ever seem to do it. Apparently we’ve learned nothing since the 50s, 60s, 90s, any of our history. Okay, so much for this distracting my mind.

Do you like birds?   The sound of bird song in the morning, taking pictures of them, as food? I like birdsong, I like watching the birds, I used to take more pictures than I do now. But I used to put out food for them too – sometimes you just gotta choose what you spend your money on, so now I don’t. But I’ve planted over the years to provide food for some of the birds. As far as eating them – no. Poultry, occasionally, but not a priority for me.

What’s the least used item of clothing you own? A pair of sparkly pants and a gold lame top I bought many years ago. My lifestyle hasn’t called for that kind of dressing up in a long, long time. Oh, and my swimsuit. Because. Age. Girth. Vanity.


If you care to share, what are you grateful for?  I guess these days I’m grateful I live in a rural area, where Covid-19 has hit mildly, riots do not happen when the farmers protest about water issues, life is quiet. I’m grateful my kids are safe, my friends are safe. I’m grateful I have my furry babies for company and comfort. I’m grateful I have my eyesight, hobbled as it is by cataracts soon to be taken care of,  so I can do my hobbies – my weaving, my painting, my reading. I am grateful I have enough.

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Share Your World – Memorial Day 2020

Sharing my world with Melanie and all of you seemed like a very good reason to post this morning. It’s a holiday, so I plan to keep the day simple, with very little in the way of work happening here. Kind of like most of my days.

In your opinion, does patriotism require the belief that one’s country is the greatest on earth? No. I think it requires honoring your country’s flag and leaders – assuming said leaders deserve to be honored. Perhaps I should have said history and culture. I think we have to be real though, and admit that our country is not perfect – no country is perfect. A country is made up of human beings, and perfection ain’t gonna happen. It’s a lot like loving your family and friends – they are not faultless, and we do not expect them to be.

Why is patriotism considered by some to be the highest of virtues? What is so important about love of country? Shouldn’t we be more concerned about humankind, or the planet as a whole, rather than a single country? I don’t know why some consider patriotism to be the highest of virtues. Yes, I think we should be concerned with humanism, compassion, perhaps not more concerned, but at least equally concerned. I think we should be concerned about our planet and its well-being, just as we should be concerned about the earth’s inhabitants and their well-being.

What is the relationship between decisions and consequences? Where there are decisions, there will be consequences. There is no way to separate the two. If we make a decision of any kind, we must be ready to accept the consequences, which should be considered to the extent possible before making a decision.

What is social justice? I don’t know – what is social justice? Is it society that defines justice? In a way, I guess it is, in that laws are made by those selected by society (not in the term as used to define wealth and that culture).

and one ‘easy’ one because those others?  Fairly difficult.

What’s one body part you wouldn’t mind losing? (told you.  Silly). My waistline girth. Is that a part? Well, it’s attached to me, so it must be. That’s the only part that I really can’t see a use for.



What is something that made you smile during the past week?

What made me smile this week? Conversations with my son and daughter, the twitter of the birds outside and they prepare to raise new young ones, the budding of my lilacs, just beginning their bloom, the budding of the peonies, which will follow the lilacs. Sunshine, springtime, awakening every morning able to get out of bed and move on my own volition.

Wishing all of you a good socially distant Memorial Day, filled with enough.


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