Reading a post this morning from a blogger I follow about how Covid has restricted our lives, and how that leads to laziness and viewing this as a “temporary” thing, when it may not be so temporary, led me to think about what changes have occurred in my life since Covid came to spend some time in this world.
I have always been solitary, I have always wanted and needed my alone time, and I have always been pretty good at finding things to do with my time. But I have always also hated being restricted by circumstances beyond my control, and there is a little bit of an occasional battle going on in my “don’t tell me what to do” brain vs my “you know what you have to do” brain.
I resent – not having the summer times with my son and daughter as we have had for so many years before this one. The restrictions stopping our girls’ lunch out times. The rising concern that Christmas may be spent home alone.
But even more, I resent those who say “it’s just another flu”, who say “you can’t tell me to wear a mask, I am free and can make my own choices” – you can, yes, you can, but I resent your lack of consideration for those around you. You are free, yes you are, but you are not free to infringe on my freedom.
It is hard not to be aware of the politics surrounding us. It is hard to not be able to understand what the Trump supporters mean when they say “I think he can get it done” – get what done? I have asked several times for an explanation as to what supporters feel he has done that is so good for the country, and I never get an answer. I have asked what he can get done, but have not gotten an answer. I suspect I know what, at least in some cases, and I find it disturbing to realize “what” has to do with immigration, so if what you want is fewer immigrants, well, he got that done. In the most inhumane way I can think of, he got that done. It’s also disturbing to me that we seem to have forgotten that we are all immigrants – those of us who are not native Americans are all immigrants. My grandparents on both sides were immigrants. My family has not been here that long.
On the other hand, during these times of Covid, I find myself more aware of my surroundings. I find myself more frequently sitting on my front deck, dog by my side, no electronic devices in hand, just watching nature. Or in the evenings, sitting in my big chair next to a window, with cat in lap, watching the play of the evening sun rays on the spray from the sprinklers when the watering system comes on. I find myself reading more, watching TV less – I have even cut the cord and am not having crazed breakdowns when my internet gets cranky and doesn’t allow me to stream.
I spend a lot of my time weaving. I find it perfectly acceptable to have pajama days and think that in isolation pajamas are perfectly suitable for daytime wear too. I find it quite acceptable to let my mind roam where it will, as you can undoubtedly tell by reading this post. It wanders. Elusively.
So my days look a lot like this: