When the Semi-Conscious Streams

I have throw rugs in the washer, inked tiles drying, bed sort of made, nothing in particular I care about doing. That is not to say there aren’t things that should be done – just that I don’t care about doing them. Right now. Maybe later.

So I’ve decided to sit down at the keyboard, let my fingers do what they want with whatever my consciousness, or semi-consciousness, comes up with. It’s anybody’s guess.

On the news last night they were talking about how many people would really like to get away from the gift giving at Christmas, and focus more on time together with loved ones. My Kat and Gep and I decided a couple of years ago not to exchange gifts. But Kat and I were not so good at that, so we still gave what we called “token” gifts. This year, we have agreed that the only gifts we will give to each other will be in the form of each of us planning a meal, buying what’s necessary for that meal, and preparing the meal during their time at home for the holidays. Sounds good to me. Besides my grown children, there are only one or two people that I occasionally give a gift, but I have decided that it’s much more fun, and with much less pressure, to simply give a gift if something seems made just for that person, just because I want to, anytime of year. I’m curious how you all feel about that.

I read an article a few days ago written by Tara Isabella Burton entitled “Spiritual but not Religious”. I found it very interesting, and I suspect that might be where I fit. I believe in a higher power, and I believe it doesn’t really matter what that higher power is called – whether it be God, Yahweh, Allah, Genesis, or any other name. Isn’t it really all the same? There is a deity of some kind, a deity with power, grace, love, a larger-than-life parent. Our beliefs stem from our culture, our upbringing, our experiences, where we are in life. It’s having a faith that matters, for me.

I have been playing with inks again – at some point before long I am going to have to decide what on earth I’m going to do with all of these tiles. They’re stacking up. I’ve changed my method of finishing them, switching to a heat tolerant varnish so they could be used for display or as a trivet. I tried clear gloss engine enamel, which is very heat resistant, and was successful with it a couple of times. It appears, however, that the time between coats is critical, sooner rather than later being best, because I started getting a crackle-type finish on my later ones. They still work as a trivet, just have a different finish. Tiles are my favorite surface, although I do some on Yupo or photo paper for greeting cards. Someday I might even market some, except when I make an active effort to sell what I’ve done it starts to feel like a job and I lose my feeling of creativity. Time will tell, as it will with so many things.

Shasta and I have been going for afternoon walks. It amazes me how quickly a dog develops a sense of routine and now around 2:30 or 3:00 in the afternoon, she comes to me, bouncing up and down, barking with her excited, shrill, hurts-the-ears bark, letting me know it’s time. “It’s time, mom! Get up, come on, we have to go!” Our walks are in the neighborhood and are short, but yesterday we did lengthen it. We both need the exercise, my mirror tells me, and Shasta spends less time wandering the yard since Bailey was less inclined to go walking, and now without Bailey. We are adjusting, and it’s going just fine.

I think now I’ll go look for my sense of humor, since it seems to be off somewhere quiet, probably slumbering. The sun is shining and inside I do not feel the cold, so chuckles should be coming from my brain, one would think. Wouldn’t one?

I’ll leave you with a tile I did this morning – one of a series I’m calling “Skies”, simply because I’m practicing doing skies with personality. Reality not required. What the scan of the tile does not show is the silver streaks in the sky, because, you know, reality not required.

About Carol

I'm me - nothing unusual, just me. Widowed, 2 grown children who are my best friends, 1 dog, retired, loving being retired. I am woman, I am strong.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

13 Responses to When the Semi-Conscious Streams

  1. Carol — “whether it be God, Yahweh, Allah, Genesis, or any other name.” I belong to an online community where we refer to that as ONE LIGHT, MANY WINDOWS 🙂

    Liked by 5 people

  2. Robin says:

    I love your stream of semi-consciousness ramblings, Carol. I love that tile, too. It’s beautiful.
    I consider myself spiritual and not religious. I’m not sure what I think of God or gods, just that I think there is a connection of some kind, as if we are all part of that energy (and perhaps we all return to it), that maybe that entity lives and experiences life through us. I don’t know what that is — a combination of many philosophies, maybe. Not Pagan, not Buddhist, not Christian, not Hindu, not anything, I guess. Close to Buddhism, maybe, but I’m afraid I don’t know enough about it, not deeply, to be sure.
    We have cut way back on Christmas gift giving. My youngest son and his wife practice the four gift rule (something you want, something you need, something to wear, and something to read) within their little family, and I love that idea. I’m with you on giving people gifts throughout the year as the opportunity arises. I’d much rather do that. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. loisajay says:

    This was such a great read, Carol. Born and raised Catholic, as were my kids. Cannot remember the last time I was inside of a church. I question too much now, so I think I have become more spiritual than religious. And that is very freeing for me.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Ally Bean says:

    Your tile is beautiful. The sky has personality. I need a dog to get me out the door on daily walks. Good for Shasta, she has your best interest at heart.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. dawnkinster says:

    Husband and I stopped buying gifts for each other a long time ago. He’s a shopper, so he buys what he wants when he wants it, leaving me very little to give. And we like different things so it’s hard for us to truly find anything the other person likes. He got me this brand new laptop, so I think we’re done buying stuff for awhile. Though we did look at refrigerators last night….hmmmm..

    I believe in God, but I don’t believe in a specific religion…and am fine if He is called something else. I struggle with my sister-in-law who is very very Catholic and would like us all to become more religious. It’s only a problem when we’re together which isn’t often so I mostly just avoid the subject.

    I WAS talking to God on my drive north, about the elderly Aunt. Enough is enough and she’s so tired and ready to go and can’t seem to shake an infection she got there, and is pretty bored and over all not happy. I don’t understand why she can’t just go now that she’s ready.

    Oh…I DO love the idea of you and your kids giving meals as gifts. After our last visit home when Mom was still alive the 4 of us kids decided that the next trip we were going to come prepared with recipes and do something similar because we could see how tiring it was for her to prepare meals for all of us. We were only there for 4 days, but still. We just took her for granted, she always made the meals and we never did much to help. She died 10 days later, and we will always feel guilty about mot helping more.

    So that’s my rambling reply to your stream of conscious.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Carol says:

      During husband’s last year or so fighting Cancer, unable to do things he liked to do, so restricted by his illness, I questioned the doctors fighting so hard to extend his life – a life that was not a life. I thought the goal should be his comfort, not lengthening life. Your aunt has lived long, and when there is no more joy, what’s the point?


  6. jay53 says:

    I love giving gifts. A few years ago, my older son and his partner decided they didn’t want us to buy them gifts anymore and basically forbade us from doing so. Rightly or wrongly, we have found this very hurtful. It’s different of course, if it’s an agreement everyone is happy with, but as it is, it’s taken a lot of the joy out of Christmas for us.

    I do agree with you about God, though. To me it matters very little what we call Him (or Her), and I’m perfectly happy if you feel more comfortable with a pantheon. I just know that there IS a supreme being (or ‘force’, or ‘energy’, which we can interpret as God), and that each of us has to find our own way to reach some kind of relationship with Him (or Her). Or decide if they want any relationship at all. Many people confuse religion with spirituality, some don’t accept that there can be any spirituality without acceptance of their own concept of God, and some don’t want a relationship at all. I’m OK with that too. The only things I’m not happy with are 1) religions which promote any kind of harm, and 2) anyone who feels they can use any kind of force to compel anyone else to join ‘their’ religion or to think the way that they do.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Carol says:

      Perhaps give your son and his partner gifts on non-holidays? Or buy gifts for children/families that can’t afford to buy their own?


      • Jay says:

        Sadly they will not accept anything from us, at any time at all. I do give gifts to the less fortunate though, both by standing order and by responding to appeals – I have a bag of socks for a “Socks for the homeless” drive at the moment – but it’s not the same as reciprocal gift giving between friends and family. I guess it just highlights the fact that there are so few of us left these days.


  7. Lisa says:

    Mind wanderings….I’m all for those! Entrepreneur’s side of the family agreed to do a gift exchange a few years ago; complete with “stealing” if someone opened something you like better than what you got. The only problem is his parents still feel the need to buy for all their boys and, they in turn, always want to buy for their parents! So what did we accomplish?! 😀 Religious or spiritual? I think you know my worldview. I think it’s sad the word “religious” holds such a negative connotation in our culture. I think there are a lot of mad-made rituals that are unnecessary in worshiping God; and believe he cares more about the core of a person’s heart than practices in which we outwardly participate. For me, striving to be an authentic Christian is freeing in and of itself because I know, even though I try (and am far from perfect) there is no condemnation in Christ and I have an assurance of forgiveness because of the sacrifice made for me. I am free to love and show grace/mercy to others because of the grace and mercy God has shown me. He is a god of second chances and I need all those I can get. I hope you and yours have a beautifully blessed holiday. xoxo

    Liked by 1 person

    • Carol says:

      When I think “religion” I tend to think specific organized religions, I.e., Catholic, Lutheran, etc. which is great if it works for you. I have no objection to any religion, but I do have a problem with people who claim to be Christian and behave in a most unChristian manner. You are, I believe, a more true Christian. I believe faith is important, and I am happy we can practice our brand of faith in this country, whatever it might be. Unless it’s some form of devil worship – my tolerance doesn’t go that far.


I'd love to hear from you!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.