Thoughts of Undetermined Value

It’s happened again! I had some thoughts for a blog post the other day, and so as to be sure not to lose them, I typed them up on a document on the computer – safe, right? Uh huh. Except now that I’m ready to sit down and share them, I cannot find that document. Those darn elves that keep stealing things really need to go live somewhere else! I’m getting tired of their sneaking around behind my back and hiding things. My things. Not their things. Mine!

So – anyway – at least one of those thoughts is still in my brain. There have been times in recent months when I’ve wondered what became of girlfriends from my school days – primarily high school, because I don’t remember friends from before that. Too many moves, too many changes. The problem with trying to locate girlfriends is that we grow up, we marry, we change our names. For one friend in particular, I remember the name of the boy who was her love the last time we were in touch, but then we lost touch and I don’t know if they married, or if they did, if they stayed married. I’d like to find her, because I’ve been having another vexing memory loss – which is the last name of my love when we last were together. I can picture him, I remember his first name and nickname, I know he was from Texas. I know I was sure we were going to marry once we got out of high school (this was at the ripe old age of 15), and we were going to live happily ever after. Because that’s what girls did then. But my family moved. Again. Distance makes relationships tough, especially at the ripe old age of 15. We did not marry, so we did not live happily ever after. Why does it matter what his last name was? It doesn’t, but questioning minds want to know.

There was another girlfriend, who I did keep in touch with for longer. I know she married a classmate, I know they did live happily ever after, I know they had kids. I know he died, not that many years ago, but then my life was in a turmoil and – we lost touch. Now I wonder, is she still alive? Life is complicated by the fact that women marry and change their names.

Oh! Miracle of miracles! I just found my notes. Hidden very well because apparently I did not name the file, so it got saved as Blank. Who the heck would look at a file named Blank? So! I’ve been saved! Aren’t you excited?

Memories from those teen years, when vanity ruled. When I hear about or think about Pikes Peak, what always comes to mind is the time we lived nearby, during those teen years, when the thing to do Easter morning was to go to the sunrise services at Pikes Peak. In those days, we still got new dresses for Easter Sunday, and those dresses were a key component – required to be shown off, to flaunt all of our gloriousness in those dresses. Never mind if they were sleeveless, never mind if Pikes Peak on Easter Sunday before sunrise could never be called “warm”. A coat of jacket would have hidden those new dresses, and were, therefore, verboten. Yeah, right. Nowadays I would probably wrap myself in a blanket worn over my warm sweats. Okay, so I do also think about the beauty of Pikes Peak, especially as the sun rises over those red, red rocks. A prize in that beautiful state of Colorado.

Another high school memory – drive in theaters. Again in Colorado, on Saturday nights they had dusk to dawn movies – started at dusk, went on till dawn. We used to crowd as many as possible into my boyfriend’s old Ford (yes, that boyfriend who has no last name), and head for the movies. The fact that they showed dusk to dawn usually ended up getting me in trouble and grounded, because although we never stayed till dawn (if we had, we would not have survived to tell about it), it was difficult to watch all of 2 or 3 movies and get me home by curfew – a very conservative curfew of 10:00. I gotta tell you, I spent a lot of time that summer being grounded.

So here I am, wondering what Tex’s (nickname – real name was Charles, but he was from Texas, so. . .) last name was, what happened to Rose, where the two or three Janets I knew are now. If one of the Janets, whose mother always made the most delicious yeast rolls, timed to be ready to be slathered with butter and eaten hot just after we got home from school, also made those delicious yeast rolls.

Life is full of questions never to be answered.

And, of course – a couple more of my inked ghost trees.