I recently had a day of battle with my subconscious, except that the subconscious fights in insidious ways, not at all fairly. You know how, suddenly, you feel anxious? Suddenly, things are just not right? No? I hope you don’t, because it is not at all pleasant. It is something that has vested itself in me in these more recent, more “mature” years. My natural ability to worry about things that need not be worried about, but simply dealt with, combined with misfiring seretonins (a gift of older age) sometimes gets my system, emotional and physical, in a real dither. That is the subconscious (hereafter to be known as SC) comes in, adding to the confusion.
We have vehicle issues – nothing major, but any vehicle issue is not cheap. These are largely external – for the van it is a case of our non-winter tires getting old and wearing. The problem is, it also was out of alignment for awhile and so one tire has worn more than the other 3. I was advised of this, of course. So, of course, old SC grasped this knowledge and held it close to its heart, just waiting to dump it on me at a time of weakness. In addition, the brakes on the Honda are soft, which worries me and made me avoid driving it. So here I am, with two vehicles, each causing me worry. Worry. Because. SC. Said. I. Should. Baaaaad SC. Baaaad me, for letting it niggle and not realizing what it was doing. Because SC is very good at that, niggling, nibbling, sitting in there cackling. It takes pleasure in discomfort of its outer body and that body’s emotions.
Then there are the daily stresses – the husband having pain, the dog who decides to refuse to eat, the fact that none of us are getting any younger, and the issue of mortality having been brought home too often in the past few years. The reminder that we are all mortal. And I know this, I accept this. For the future.
So SC and Anxiety got together and pulled their ugly shroud over my head for a recent day. For part of a recent day, because not long after crawling into my big comfy chair and covering myself with my big comfy blankie, taking deep breaths, I recognized what was going on. It took a bit longer to recognize what it was that was lingering within the depths of old SC, feeding old Anxiety. But recognition finally dawned, and so I did what I should have done a week ago. I talked with our mechanic. Yes, that tire is thin, but not dangerously so. It will serve until the first of November when we have the winter studded tires put on, and new tires can be purchased in the spring. The Honda will probably need a Master Cylinder (apparently a crucial part of the braking system) soon, but not immediately soon. The Honda is rarely driven in the winter, so as winter gets closer, I shall take it in, have its Master thingy replaced (if that is indeed deemed to be the problem – and probably is, since Honda has 226,000 miles on it and has never gotten a new one of those) and new tires put on it, and now life is just fine again. And it will make the budget manageable.
Sometimes SC and Anxiety beat out common sense. When they do, I am in trouble. But all is well again. I cannot, in good conscience (not to be confused with Sub-conscious) leave you with any sense of sadness, distress or discomfort. So I will share with you a bit more – well,the first is a complaint, but the second is more cheerful.
Complaint: I just updated my iPad to iOS6, and updated my apps accordingly. I read all of my blogs, or 99% of my blogs, on Flibboard, which draws from Google Reader. Up until this update, I was thrilled with this app. However, now things have changed, and it is not just the app, it is more widespread. In reading most of the blogs, the photos all come up as thumbnails, hard to see. Tap on them and it takes me to a separate page with a way-too-large photo. Equally annoying is the fact that when I get to a blog and I tap “like” – because I liked what they had to say but have nothing to add – it blinks at me, takes me to the top of the page, and does not show that I “liked”. I have filed a complaint with Flipboard, although I am not at all certain it is their problem, and we shall see what they say.
Now, for cheer. When the Artistic One and I went to the fair nearly two weeks ago, one of the highlights of the fair was “Dock Dogs”. I suspect most of you reacted as I did – “What on earth are Dock Dogs?” So, let me show you.

The object is for the dog to sit at the far end of the “dock” while the owner gets to the end of the dock, and, when the command is given and the owner throws the dog toy, the dog comes racing down the dock, leaping off the end, into the air, reaching for the toy and ultimately landing in the pool of water. The dog that leaps the furthest wins. Here, you see dog leaping, reaching for the toy.

See the splash at the left end of the photo? That’s the dog landing. Good distance for this Border Collie.
This older Yellow Lab did not do so well, but he made a gallant effort.

This short-haired – spaniel or pointer? – preferred to play as opposed to stay.
Wasn’t that fun?


Yes, I’ve read about dock dogs in our local paper…apparently they have shows here but I haven’t been to one.
Big hugs….that old SC gets us all now and then. Once we’re over it we feel soooo much better.
Indeed we do!
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I say the “F” word — Fiddlesticks! — on the old SC. It gets the best of every single one of us every now and again.
Have you tried the WordPress app? It has a reader now. Also, I upgraded, then had about 12 app updates to get apps to work with the new system. Glad the mechanic helped ease your concerns. That is a lot on your plate! Hang in there. Hugs to you.
Angelia, I’ve downloaded all the updates as well as iOS6. That’s when my problems started. I’ve been looking at the WP app, and I’ve found the reader, but it doesn’t list all the blogs I subscribe to, and I cannot figure out how to add more. It’s a learning process, I’m sure.
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Check to make sure brake lines dont have air in honda……that might be the problem.
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The SC can really mess things up from time to time. Glad you got it back under control
Also, I love the Dock Dogs. We call them “Air Dogs” here. Good luck getting reacquainted with your updated machine!
I have seen those dogs on TV jumping into lakes.
I see a few gold medals in those pictures!……..lol
You did a great leap in this blog from the anxiety and SC to jumping dogs. It is hard on those anxious–and/or restless days. I don’t think any of us are immune. I truly admire you, Carol, and how you seem to press on even with the stress of cancer (and vehicle) issues so close. I will tell you a secret. Barry’s boss said he would shut down his business if Obama were to be re-elected. I refuse, refuse, REFUSE to let my SC even BEGIN to think about it because I would be scared to death for months to come. I always go back to the old standby Grace and try to put my faith in that… Love…
P.S. He’s been known to say things like this just to let off steam. We hope.
Yes. We hope.
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I happen to think Barry’s boss should place the blame on Congress and obviously my politics differ from his but you’re right. Worrying will change nothing.
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Our politics are probably more similar to yours… Thanks, Carol.
I love my car, until it plays up on me! I went through the same worries with my car about 18 months ago Carol. It ended up costing me over $2,000 for repairs and new tires, and the car was barely five years old at the time! And when there is one problem, every other problem in the world seems to escalate in your SC! I’m pleased to hear that your immediate worries resolved themselves so quickly.
Wow, beautiful leap! As to the ol’ SC annoyance, I defintely relate to this – when leaving those left overs in the fridge, ignoring them every time you go in to see what there is to eat, knowing you really need to check inside … eventually, of course, you don’t need to, you can just chuck it out in all good conscience knowing it has to be rancid by now. Unfortunately when ignoring other things like tires, or that health check up – turning rancid is not a good thing. We need to tune in to the SC regularly to separate the wheat from the chaff and move up on the important things – thanks for the reminder. Good post – enjoyed it, Carol.